Upon recently nosediving into the world of online dating, I have been puzzled with one aspect of "modern" dating. Now don't get me wrong, I'm only 24 so I haven't had a lifetime of dating experience. However, I am puzzled by the current trend of texting as a primary form of dating communication instead of calling to ask me out or getting to know me.

In fact, I am so annoyed by the texting me first thing that it has become a deal breaker. I personally would like to know if my date has an abnormally high voice.

So now I question, is this something I'll just have to deal with or should I stay on the "if he doesn't have balls to call then I don't want to date him" path?

Decisions, Decisions.

Personality: Type A Chaos

So many of you may know, I am a walking disaster. I am clumsy, always have bruises that I don't know how I get, and my bedroom at any given moment looks like a department store AND sporting goods store exploded. But here's the thing: in my head I am crazy organized. 

I swear I color code my thoughts. 

I THINK IN EXCEL SPREADSHEET FORM

I get mad when shirts with phrases on them have improper punctuation. Just ask http://www.girlwithblog.com/

I constantly struggle with closing the gap. Wouldn't it be nice to come home to a clean house that is extremely organized? Moms of two year olds can do it even though they live with multiple tornados who fingerpaint and leave things everywhere. I have just me. No animals to blame it on or roommates. 

Now I love living alone but man I'm horrible at being domestic. 

In college, I usually had a crazy organized room that's just b/c the rooms were glorified shoe boxes .

Tonight, I will toast by myself b/c I can't go out because I lost my 2nd debit card in a month's time to attempting to better my external organization. And to putting my cards in the right slots in my wallet.

Amy 

Pinstripes

I realized I never told you about my date to that bocce ball joint. It was a nice place that he picked, but he didn't really research the location properly. We needed a reservation (resulting in us talking by the bar for 45 minutes which wasn't too bad, but definitely awkward) for both dinner AND bowling AND bocce ball so we ended up just getting dinner. The food was pretty delicious and I chowed down. I will not lie. I figure I am a very food oriented person, so why not just allow that to show on the first date right....?

Continue onto date. He was very nice, but kinda awkward. There definitely was no spark. And he told me he broke up with his last girlfriend of a year this spring. As it recently snowed in Minnesota in MAY, I will venture to say this young man was not ready for a new girlfriend. And I, my friends, am no rebound.

The end of the date was the most awkward check paying experience I have ever experienced. Now you are all probably familiar with the check dance.

Those of you who watch, "How I Met Your Mother" are probably familiar with the Check Dance:
Check comes. Guy gets out wallet. Girl offers to pay her part. Ending goes from there.

My Check Dance: Check comes. Guy gets out wallet. I offer to pay my part. He stares at me. No response either way. So. Awkward. So I put my card in, he puts his card in, but oh my gosh so weird.

Now, call me a snob, but typically if a guy doesn't pay on the first date and he has picked the place, I don't go on a second. I've talked to many women about this, and all of them have agreed with me. I feel it is just standard chivalrous practice. Dude, you could take me to an Applebee's happy hour, I'd totes be ok with that. Just pay.

Anyway, date ended with an awkward goodbye, and that, my friends, was my Pinstripes date.

The List is Narrowing

So I went on another date tonight from someone I met online. Sigh. The perils of dating. While getting all gussied up and giddy with anticipation is fun, I am getting tired of first and second dates. Whereas tonight's gentleman and one of last week's gentlemen were certainly nice enough, I have come to the realization that I am narrowing down what I really might want from a significant other in life. Many thanks to the numerous dates I have gone on for helping me narrow down my list.

THE LIST

• Must exude energy
• There absolutely must be a spark of some sort. Wishy washiness is no option...
• Must exude confidence
• Must not be intimidated that I'm not intimidated by a first date
• Must be decisive
• If said man is interested, and I may be interested, he must call within a week. Any more time than that is enough time for me to go, "Hmmm..."
• Must not invite me home on the first date... didn't your mothers teach you anything?!

That, ladies and gents, concludes my list. Oh and I suppose he needs to do his own laundry, as we all know that I have enough without someone else's laundry to Downy Wrinkle Release. Yup. I said it.

On a side not, I am watching JAWS III and am highly disappointed with the anatomical inaccuracies Everyone knows sharks have more than one row of teeth. Get it right 1983.

Pantsless Saturdays

Seeing as I promised I would make a better effort to update this, I thought updating right now was a great way to delay my run. It is 11 am on Saturday, and I still haven't put pants on yet. Yup. A run isn't happening for a while. On the flip side, underwear and a tee is a perfect live alone Saturday morning get up. Until you remember the blinds are open in your den, and because your recliner is electric and slow to rise, it is an awkward 30 seconds between the time you discover your neighbors can see you and you actually sit up.

This Week's Highlights:

Awaking at 4 am for the Royal Wedding. It just reenforced my desire to become a princess. Except I'd be princess to Prince Harry... Everyone knows his future wife will be the ruckus causer and I am not the pursed lips type...

Giant blister that has prevented me from running all week. This may not sound that important for you all, but seriously, I have way too much energy that I need to get out of my system, and running is my way of doing it. Sitting on an upright bike, albeit I bike into a hot sweaty mess, just doesn't give me the same satisfaction as running faster than the person next to me on the treadmill, or pushing myself to do a second lap around a lake. This abundance of energy has resulted in my tripping over my already clumsy self, running into lots of things, and an abundance of bruises. I'm telling you, I'm going to make them into a fashion statement. Purple and Royal Blue are Jewel Tones which are supposedly popular.

11:10 AM- I still have not put on pants.

I only will work at the gym 1-2 late nights a week now, which I am pumped about! Weeehoooooo for a little more free time.

This week was chaotic, so no more entertaining dates to speak of. I do have one tonight at a new place called Pinstripes, a local bowling/boccee ball joint. We shall see! Wish me luck folks.

Now I am off to put on some running shorts and socks and hope that my blister is FINALLY better.

For Now We Are Young...

Today reminded me of a song. Neutral Milk Hotel's "In the Aeroplane Over The Sea." In real life, supposedly, it is about Anne Frank... which is depressing. But today, the sun streaming through the steeple of my church reminded me of an excerpt of the song.

But for now we are young
Let us lay in the sun
And count every beautiful thing 
We can see
Love to be
In the arms of all I'm keeping here with me




Beauty is everywhere. It was in the eyes of the little ones smelling the flowers this morning, the wrinkles on the faces of the elderly surrounded by their beloved families, it is in the Easter plant that is now sitting on top of my sink, juuuust where my grandma would have put it. And it was in the new life that I was surrounded by all day. Crying babies, green grass, and trumpet lilies (one of my favorite reminders of new life) and in a large part of the congregation pretending to be Easter Bunnies because Everybunny needs to spread the word that Christ is Risen.

I go to bed tonight with a happy heart, slightly saddened by the loss of the physical presence of my grandpa, but lightened with the reassurance that he is rejoicing in heaven.

The Greatness that is In The Aeroplane Over the Sea

On Potential Awkward Dates

I recently had a great date that could have gone seriously wrong, but because I frequently find myself in awkward and embarrassing situations, I was able to coyly finagle myself out of the foreseen awkwardness. Or I just wasn't embarrassed. Either way it was a night full of hilarity with a new person. The evening progressed like this:

"Amy?"
"Yup, that's me. Nice to meet you!"

{Insert 30 seconds of walking behind hostess here}

{Insert Amy sliding on the slippery, wood floor and face-planting it in front of the table}

{Laughs ensue}

Conversation eventually resumed after 5 minutes of laughing, and the waitress asking if I wanted a drink because it would make me feel better.

Then my super cute date knocked his beer ALL OVER the table, making me feel significantly less clumsy.

This was shortly followed by me knocking my entire silverware set on the floor. This may seem minor, however, when a knife, fork, and spoon all clank on a (slippery) wood floor, it attracts a few stares. Then my date suggested that we walk around and find an arcade, which would have been super fun, except that I stupidly wore uncomfortable shoes, so I painfully but gracefully walked around. We called it a night, and he walked me to the car, and ended the evening with the promise of a second date (we really did have a good time).

Then I noticed my phone was missing. Found flip flops in car, and went on a wild goose chase for phone. When phone was retrieved, I did have a nice text from said date.

This concludes what could have been an extremely awkward date, but was really just hilarious. And SO MUCH BETTER than This Date .